I woke up this morning at 5am as I have been doing a lot lately (unintentionally).  But instead of laying in bed trying to fall back asleep, I decided to wake up and watch the sunrise from our balcony.  One hour later I was still on the balcony, not realizing that a full hour had passed in what felt like minutes.  It was a conversation with God that brought Him nearer than before and made everything feel less distant.  I'll explain.

 

I woke up and could hear the roosters crowing and crickets chirping, if I listened enough, I thought I could even hear the ocean waves crashing on the shore (but that might have been my imagination, though I can see the ocean from the balcony).  It was silence, something that doesn't happen too often in a house of 12 girls.  But I began to realize why I might be sleeping so little, because God wanted me to be able to spend time with Him, uninterrupted, quiet, just time with the Lord.  And how wonderful it was!  I realized that my priorities can be pretty messed up, I've gotten into the routine of having this amount of time with God at this point in the day, and having time with Him, yet becoming so distracted by people around and noise and too much going on.  God pointed out to me this morning that a big part of what I am missing in our relationship is patience.  

 

I thought I knew patience.  I am able to wait, wait on tangible things though.  I find it difficult to sit in silence, waiting to hear the voice of God, the voice I am unaccustomed to at times.  But, once God begins to speak, time slips through your fingers like sand.  He began to speak to me about how I not only need to be patient in waiting for Him to speak, but also in waiting on His timing.  Sometimes things don't go well or I think they should be another way or whatever the case may be, but His timing is the best and, when you wait on it, you will find out why.  I figured that out this morning even with the sunrise.

 

 I stayed outside until the sky was lit, I was about to go inside when I decided I would rather grab some paper and a pencil and write and talk with God some more.  I asked a lot of 'why' questions and sang (whispered, it was only nearly 6am yet) the songs that came to my mind.  Everything related back to love (I'm not sure it's fully set in yet, so the questions and God's responses may be for a blog next week).  And as I watched the sunrise, the lyrics, "The wonders of Your mighty love" came to my mind.  Just ponder it for a minute.

 

Anyway, the next time I looked up from my paper, I saw a burst of color behind the trees.  I waited longer and watched as the glimmer spread through the skies.  I thought I had seen the sunrise earlier: I saw color in the sky, but I had almost missed the brightest part, out of impatience and listening to myself on time.  I  realized then that it's the same with spending time with God.  When I walk away because I think He is done speaking, or I tune Him out, I may miss out on the brilliance He has to show me.  And, as it would have been with the sunrise, I would think that glimmer I saw, those pastel colors, would have been the best I would receive.  But, in waiting, I was able to see more of God and He revealed more to me. 

 

I'm not sure if all of this makes sense, most of my blogs are premeditated, but I really wanted to post this.  God is asking me to shout what He whispers from the rooftops, so spreading it across the internet might be a pretty good way to start!

 

In God's love,

Bri